How to Avoid Academic Success

(While the following article focuses on commuters, its ideas are useful for all.)

Academic Success can be a real burden. It not only involves discipline and effort and commitment, but one must also cope with the good feelings that result. Many students find these costs too much to bear and look for strategies to avoid Academic Success. Because of the unique demands and pressures facing thern, commuter students have available to them a number of creative strategies to avoid Academic Success if they so choose.

In particular, research shows that a major factor contributing to the Academic Success of commuter students is INVOLVEMENT in the campus community--not only involvement in coursework, but also involvement with faculty, student organizations, cultural and sports events, work opportunities and so on. Students who get involved in one way or another tend to have higher GPA'S, higher rates of academic retention, and greater satisfaction with their college experience.

If you are one of those commuter students who fears acadmic success or doesn't like to feel good, you might like to try one of the strategies listed below:

AVOIDANCE STRATEGIES

1. "My Car is my Second Home" Technique: Do your assigments, reading, eating, and napping in your car to avoid interpersonal contact in the library, union, dining halls, and other social areas.
2. "Make Yourself Scarce" Rationalization: Work 2 or 3 part time jobs off-campus so you have a good excuse for not joining campus groups.
3. "Squeeze" Technique: Schedule classes and obligations back-to-back to prevent opportunities to visit faculty office hours, Department socials, seminars, or participate in sports/recreation activities on campus.

DISORGANIZATION STRATEGIES

1. "Why Do Today What You Can Put Off .... ?" Strategy: Put off doing academic work and campus extracurricular activities in favor of soaps, sleep, or cleaning the dog house.
2. "In the Moment" Style: Remain impulsive, don't plan ahead, don't set priorities. Continue to live in the moment, doing what cames easiest--avoidance.

ISOLATION STRATEGIES

1. "Cat's Got Your Tongue" Technique: Follow the common practice of talking to no one before, during, or after classes.
2. "Professor's Got the Plague" Strategy: Never go to a professor's office hours or talk to her/him after class.
3. "Birds of a Feather ..." Strategy: Assume you don't fit in on and socialize off-campus only with people who have no connection to UMCP.

If you are serious about avoiding Academic Success, these tips should help. WARNING: If you choose not to follow these suggestions, we cannot be responsible for the consequences -- satisfaction with your tenure on campus and successful completion of your degree.

This article was written by Dr. Kathy Zamostny and the late Dr. Stanley Hunt. Dr. Zamostny is currently a counselor at the University of Maryland Counseling Center as was Dr. Hunt before he died.